Have you seen this man?

On my way home the other night, I heard the Goo Goo Dolls "Name" on Delilah. Which, to immediately digress, I shouldn't be listening to in the first place. And something in the chorus or the bridge caught my attention. "I think About ya All the time." That and the caller's story didn't seem to jive too well with my perception of the song. And Delilah doesn't usually do that. So I started paying attention to the lyrics to see if she had a reason I was unaware of for picking the song. I don't remember now what the story was or why I thought Delilah may have missed her mark. But I do remember that at the time I started thinking of what I think of all the time. And that day, it was what I want in a guy. What I desire in a relationship, more specifically from any man I would be in a relationship with. And I started a list. In my head. And thought "I should post this, because it's a little bit funny, and (shrug) who knows if someone knows this man I'm looking for."

A few weeks ago I also put a post on facebook to the effect: John Mayer told me to Say What (I) Need To Say so I texted and told everyone how much they mean to me. Now he says "If you want more love, just say so" I WANT MORE LOVE!!!!!!! As if it's that easy. I wish it were. But, maybe. If I put it in writing. Something will happen.

So here's my list. Which I'm already certain will be significantly longer than I realize.

• Beautiful arms.
• Gainfully employed
• Lives on his own, i.e. not with parents, or has a solid plan to get there
• is good with other people's kids
• taller/broader enough to make me feel small
• i kind of have a thing for tattoos, but not creepy skulls kind of ones or half naked women.
• Considerate, carries the groceries, opens doors, gifts/thoughtfulness for no reason
• Should go without saying, but is also 8 down on the list. Is in LOVE with Jesus
• on that note, inspires me to deepen my own relationship with Jesus.
• makes me laugh regularly
• enjoys some of the same movies & music as I do
• doesn't make me feel stupid when I ask questions. Especially about sports or mechanical things.
• Can carry on a reasonably intelligent conversation without a temper tantrum
• Respects my emotions and the highs and lows I live with,
• but challenges me to communicate when all I want to do is curl up in a ball or retreat into facebook
• Helps my friends out. Moving. Dishes. Roofing. whatever his skillset might be.
• Talks to me like an average human being.
• has friends
• has hobbies
• wants me to keep my friends and hobbies
• believes in me
• in my business
• in my writing
• will consider doing some of the leg work to getting me published
• gets along well with my family
• and my Iowa family
• Willing to jump through my "hoops" to win my heart and hand
• and by hoops I mean my nearest and dearest friends who get to help me screen out the creeps and ill-equipped
• understands that depression is a really nasty beast that I don't believe I'll ever truly be free of
• understands that for 1-2 days a month I am a raving lunatic and don't know why.
• figures out why and makes sure to stock the house in chocolate and coke. ;)
• thinks my days of raving lunacy are actually kind of funny.
• kisses me in the rain
• kisses me to shut me up.
• often.
• touches me in public. small gestures. hand on the back, shoulder, neck, knee.
• Looks for me across the room.
• ambitious. He needs to be gainfully employed, but I'd love someone ambitious who is planning and executing towards something bigger
• a partner.
• cleans the toilet.
• Plans to be married til death do us part
• someone like my daddy.
• will dance with me
• loves my curly hair
• and my curves
• thinks I'm funny
• and smart
• and capable
• and talented
• makes me feel safe and protected.

Is that too much to ask?