Dear Santa,

Was my only true request, the deepest desire of my heart, really too much to ask for this season?  Really?  The required components too expensive? The level of quality too high for your elves?  I didn't really want much, just ...

a man with Pierce Brosnan's taste in women,

Looks like Ryan Reynolds,



Sings like a cross between Josh Groban and Michael Buble,

 and the eloquence of The Script




And, of course, thinks I'm the most beautiful woman he's ever known and thinks I hung the moon.

Was that really too much to ask for?